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Families with babies and families without babies are sorry for each other.

(1853—1937)

U.S. humorist

A woman is as old as she looks before breakfast.

(1853—1937)

U.S. humorist

If you don't learn to laugh at trouble, you won't have anything to laugh at when you grow old.

(1853—1937)

U.S. journalist

Everyone has something ancestral, even if it is nothing more than a disease.

(1853—1937)

U.S. journalist

None of us can boast about the morality of our ancestors. The records do not show that Adam and Eve were married.

(1853—1937)

U.S. journalist

We love the Lord, of course, but we often wonder what he finds in us.

(1853—1937)

A man is usually bald four or five years before he knows it.

(1853—1937)

When you can't do anything else to a boy, you can make him wash his face.

(1853—1937), American journalist

Even if a farmer intends to loaf, he gets up in time to get an early start.

"Pain is deeper than all thought; laughter is higher than all pain."